Certainly not here, on this poor, cobwebbed blog.
And they're not in my diary either - I think the last time pen touched paper on those pages was new year's eve (and I don't think I even finished that entry).
The words are also missing from, er, Word. Yes, those plans I had for writing a short story have come to very little indeed.
You know what is frustrating? The words, they are all in my head! Spinning around and keeping me awake at 4am. And that is not terribly useful. Just annoying!
Anyway. I will get there. (Sigh)
On the home front we appear to be winning the potty training war. After months of having no idea of what we could possibly mean by 'you can make the wee come out!' T has finally had the penny drop. This is very exciting!
T is going to the potty about 15 times a day, just because she can!
She currently has this weird thing she does with her eyes, where she kind of stares into space with her eyelids half closed and eyeballs rotated up. It looks awful. And it is causing me to freak out in the middle of the night. 'Could it be a brain tumour? Maybe she has a brain tumour...'
One of our dear friends is an eye specialist. I took T to see her in her rooms; she's been checked out. Ain't no brain tumour, just a weird thing she does with her eyes. To freak her mama out...
Meanwhile, E is killing me slowly and painfully with his whining and failure to do simple tasks like put on shoes or brush teeth when he's asked to. This was really getting me down until I was chatting to some of the mums of other kids in his class and they all said, 'Gosh, we're getting that too!'
Glad to hear it's not just me. I have a bit of a theory that kids are always one step ahead of us (well, the eldest kid anyway - as they're the ones forging into uncharted parenting territory) and sometimes they throw us right out and need to catch up to where they're at. I think E is at one of those points right now.
So I spend my days being firm with him, in an effort to rein in his annoying behaviour. Then I feel guilty that I've been too tough on him. I am all over the place.
This morning I did a little treasure hunt for him and the final prize was two chocolate freckles. In response to my written clues he wrote me a note and it read: 'Dear Mum, Thank you for the freckles. I don't deserve them. Love E.'
I was flabbergasted and a bit horrified.
I mean, I've just been trying to teach him a few boundaries, I don't want to crush the kid's spirit!! My goodness, I felt so guilty.
Anyway. We do our best. Right?